Volume 3, Issue 10 - October 2002

What is
Success?

I've been speaking on success recently… trying to get a handle on it so I may share it with others. There is a sign that I have driven past (Barrie, Ontario, I think) that says "Success is a journey… not a destination."

One of the things that I have noticed is the fact that our views of success will change many times in our lives. We have to be able to change with them or we will forever be unhappy. We have to stop trying to obtain success in the monetary ways that society measures success. We need to know what makes us happy, and consider that a success.

Take when you are a child. What was your view of success then? I know that for my 11 year old, he is successful when he beats his GameBoy® game. Success to him is not necessarily getting all his math questions done right or done on time. Success is scoring a goal on his brother as they play street hockey. If you ask him if he had a successful day, it depends on how much fun he had and very little on how well he did that day.

My mom runs a golf snack bar. Her days are successful when she is able to keep the coffee fresh, the sandwiches made, and get the golfers in and out of the pro shop in less than two minutes. Her day isn't successful if it rains and there are 30 golfers waiting for a grilled cheese at the same time.

My day is successful when I get to almost see the bottom of the pile on my desk. If I walk out of my office and the pile is not bigger than when I walked in, it was a successful day. When I am delivering a keynote speech or a day of training, my day is considered successful if people felt that they learned something new, or they had a great time just participating and learning. It is not a successful day when someone falls asleep in my class. Which is not fair is it? It could be that they were up all night long with a sick child and had to come to work the next day. It could be that the fact that they were sleeping had no reflection on how interesting my talk was. But to me it was.

Why is it that we judge how successful we are by the response of other people? Why does television and magazines tells us that we need to acquire 'Things' to be successful? Why do we all need to constantly earn more money to be considered successful? Why cannot love be enough? I think it is… we just need to adjust our views on success.

Ralph Waldo Emerson has it right with his poem on Success:

"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, or a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded."

So today, don't measure your success by what others think. Go back to being a kid when a successful day was one where you had fun. Avoid trying to compare yourself to others. Be sure to smile. Redefine your definition of success to be a little closer to Ralph Waldo Emerson's definition.

Enjoy.

Rhonda Scharf (Finniss), CSP is a Certified Professional Speaker, Trainer and Author and President of ON THE RIGHT TRACK - Training & Consulting and is available to deliver customized training programs or keynote speeches at your next convention. Call her today at 1-877-213-8608 or e-mail Rhonda@on-the-right-track.com. Why not take a moment and sign up here for her complimentary quarterly newsletter.